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Monogamy

We all remember where we were when the news first broke about Obergefell v. Hodges and the dawn of legal same-sex marriage in the United States. While we still have a ways to go to bring all members of the LGBT community total equality, this decision certainly led to a lot of happy tears. Monogamy isn't for everyone, and marriage doesn't have to be a part of it--but here is some food for thought if you're trying to decide. 


Why try it? Committed relationships bring you a different set of feelings than one-night stands. You have the chance to evolve as a person, but it takes self-sacrifice to learn to trust and love someone. When this happens, there is an opportunity to develop a deeper relationship with the person you are with. This partnership can be very rewarding and satisfying.


There is also the practical side of being in a long term relationship.  When you are sick, for example your partner can get your meds from the HEB, or make your chicken soup! The couple can divide chores around the apartment or house.  Also, after a long day’s work, your partner can give you a well deserved sensual massage.  


Relationship counselors say that one of best things you can do to live a longer, healthier, happier life - is to be in a loving, long term relationship. Who hasn’t thought of growing older with your best friend? It's a comfort knowing that when your hair is grayer and your life becomes slower, there will be someone to take care of you and love you.


For those who seek a committed bond, and are successful in staying with one person - love can be a beautiful thing!


Why stay away? Straight, gay, or somewhere in between, monogamy might not be for you. Maybe you hate when someone steals the blankets. Maybe you’re too busy to bother with a boyfriend. Maybe monogamy is just plain boring to you. Thankfully, we live in a world where we can all make that choice. Just remember, the more partners you have unprotected sex with, the more potential STD exposure you are opening yourself up to.


Safe sex in monogamy. Many couples who agree to stay monogamous decide to forgo condom use. This makes sense only if you do two things: first, get tested and second, stay monogamous. While it is theoretically safer to have sex with one person instead of 25, if that person is HIV positive and doesn’t know it, then being monogamous won’t protect you from exposure to HIV. Many men that test positive are not getting infected from anonymous sex partners they met over Grindr, but from their long-time lovers. Additionally, if either of you decide to have sex outside your relationship, you are both at risk again. Read some tips here on being in an open relationship and staying negative.